PCOS- Body Betrayal.

This is going to be a ranting post so hold on tight.

I have been having a hell of a time with my PCOS symptoms lately. I am gaining weight, craving sugar and crying at commercials. I haven’t had a real period in months. In fact, I have gained so much weight that I am unable to work out like I have been because my body hurts. I have never been the one that couldn’t take my dog for a walk down the block or not be able to walk up 2 flights of stairs, but now my body is completely betraying me. It is taking all my effort to walk on the treadmill for 30 minutes at a slow pace. WHAT IS HAPPENING?

I started going back into the depression mode and people at work started to notice. I can’t stand it because no one understands- except for if you have it. If you have it you can spot the symptoms a mile away. A girl that I work with straight up asked me if I had PCOS and I felt an overwhelming sense of relief when we started to talk about it. Someone else finally understood how hard it is to live this life everyday.

One of the most common struggles I hear when researching or talking to others that have PCOS is that we feel so alone. No one understands just how deep and complex the issue is, not even the doctors who we are trusting to treat it.

PCOS symptoms are complex.

The many symptoms of PCOS

Let’s break it down.

Physical Symptoms

The biggest issue with the physical symptoms, especially as a child, is the shaming that comes with it. The self shaming for letting it get that way, the feeling of shame when you step on the scale at the doctor and their response is “if you lose the weight the symptoms will go away.. you need to lose X amount of pounds. If you can’t do it on your own we will need to explore surgery. “

Thats all fine and dandy, but the internal symptoms of PCOS make that virtually impossible.

Internal/Hormonal Symptoms

The Insulin resistance is the biggest culprit. The best way to describe this is that when you have insulin resistance your body is not processing food like the rest of the “normal” population. It holds on to every calorie and stores it as fat because it thinks that its starving. The food is not being used as energy in the proper way which causes extreme fatigue and sugar cravings. Not only are we always hungry but we literally cannot be satiated because our hormones say nahh. There is no magic pill to fix these hormones so they throw birth-control and diabetes meds at us that can kinda help but were not actually made to help PCOS?

Let’s review.. so were starving and our bodies are processing all foods as sugar (from celery to cupcakes) and storing as fat and the only way to help this is to lose weight. THE FUK. Not possible. Which then brings us to the mental symptoms.

Mental Symptoms

You can guess that this causes depression and anxiety and a hell of a lot of stress. Not only from the frustration of it and society judging us, but the fact that the hormones are all out of wack. This causes mood fluctuation and effects the serotonin, dopamine and cortisol levels in the body. So we take anti depressants and anti anxiety meds so that we can make it though the day without breaking down. We feed the body sugar and carbs to give us enough energy to meet the expectations of our bosses and friends. We talk with our doctors to get answers and there does not seem to be any.. so we wait it out. Wait for the next fluctuation of hormones and hope that these ones treat us just a little better.

What happens next?

Great question. I wish I had the answer for you. PCOS is a guessing game, it’s a maze and a never ending puzzle that is consistently missing pieces. What works for one women may not work for the other. 1 in 10 women have PCOS, yet no one can come up with proper treatment for it. Most women get diagnosed with the condition when they try to get pregnant, then there are the women like me who was diagnosed at 8 years old and have been fighting this never ending battle for 20 years.

Cysters, let’s talk.

While this is the opposite of uplifting I hope that if you are a cyster this helps you feel less alone. I understand your struggle, I understand the pressure and the shame. We are all in this together. Please share your story, or comment and let everyone know that you are fighting this same battle. Tips and tricks are welcome but my goal with this is awareness and connectivity.

have a great week, keep fighting.

xoxo

Holistic Healing

I have officially embarked on the path of holistic healing!

I know what you are thinking- get out of here with that hippie voodoo shit Carly, it does not help. Well I say don’t knock it until you do some research!

What is Holistic Healing?

The dictionary definition of holistic medicine is “characterized by the treatment of the whole person, taking into account mental and social factors, rather than just the symptoms of a disease.” Holistic in my mind means that all parts that make up a human are taken into consideration when healing the self, not just managing one symptom when that may not really be the issue in the first place.

My Why?

I started looking into holistic medicine very recently. I started battling symptoms of Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome when I was 6 years old. I was gaining weight like crazy, had insanely high cholesterol and my parents shuffled me from specialist to specialist for the next 12 years of my life. I have tried every drug in the book as well as some non conventional meds.

Other symptoms associated with PCOS are anxiety and depression- I got both. Bad.

When I hit bottom I finally decided to see a therapist and she referred me to a psychiatrist and BOOM. More drugs. I was 21 years old and I was taking over 15 pills a day and guess what… I STILL had symptoms. I have switched doses, and meds over the years but we never took anything away- we just added to the madness.

At 26 years old I am taking 8 different drugs and I take 12 pills a day. 12 PILLS A DAY. I am miserable and my symptoms are worse than ever. I went to more doctors and the options given were; get bariatric surgery, go vegan and see a nutritionist. As you have read in earlier posts, I have studied nutrition for years and I don’t want to hire a nutritionist. (I did meet with one shortly after that suggestion and I was right.. I didn’t need one. ) I started to do some research to see if anything new or revolutionary has come to light.

In a seemingly unrelated occurrence, I hurt my shoulder while I was working out. I ended up going to see a family friend and her chiropractic office to see if she could help with the pain. I had just come from seeing a women’s health specialist and I remembered Dr. J (the chiropractor I was going to see) mentioned she could potentially help me with the PCOS. I was super skeptical but I decided to talk to her about it since I was all out of other options.

Enter Dr. J

When I tell you that I was shocked by this exam and explanations she gave me I am not kidding.

I had brought along my blood work from the doctor I had seen previously to show Dr. J. She suggested that she does an exam and she would be able to tell me what that paper said without ever seeing it… YA RIGHT how can a chiropractor tell me what is wrong with my hormones?

Guys.. She did it.

Not only was she able to help my shoulder she was able to test what my body needed to heal its self and she gave me natural supplements to try out. I have been on these supplements for 3ish weeks now and the difference is HUGE.

I feel lighter. I feel more energetic. My brain fog is gone. I am sleeping better, I am eating better, my anxiety is no longer controlling my days and I am the most productive I have been in years.

When people say you are what you eat, I freaking believe it. The nutritional support that I have gotten from her is literally changing my world, with results almost instantly.

Nutritional Response Testing

This is where things got voodoo-y. Dr. J uses Nutritional Response Testing (NRT) to help her understand what is “wrong” with the patient. From an outside perspective this is what it seems like.

Patient holds supplement in left hand, while their right arm is stretched out holding strong. The Doctor puts pressure on the outstretched arm and if the patient cannot resist the pressure something is off. Ummm.. What?

You can laugh, it is weird.. but it works, cause Physics. If you look up NRT on youtube or google it you can get a much more scientific depiction than what I provided above, I just wanted to prove the point that it seems voodoo-y and I was skeptical.

After this exam Dr. J explained my results and we checked the bloodwork and recommendations from the women’s health doctor I had seen that morning. They matched. 100%. *insert jaw drop here*

What’s Next?

My next visit I brought my pharmacy of meds with me and Dr. J was able to test those and see which ones my body “likes” and which ones it does not. The improvements continue to increase and I hope one day I can stop taking all the drugs and heal the actual problem.

I am continuing my research into holistic health and healing in addition to seeing dr. J and I would love to hear from you if you have any experience with holistic health or natural healing.

If you are interested in learning more about this you can check out Dr. J’s facebook page! There may also be a guest post on this blog by Dr. J coming soon so stay tuned my friends!

** Dr.J was not consulted for this post, all information is my own from my own experience with her. **

Whats up with this “Miracle Morning”?

If you have been around here for any sort of time you know how I am searching for all the tips and tricks for making the most of everyday; how to be productive, how to be positive, how to be successful, the list goes on.

I found though this research that having a set morning routine or daily practice is the most agreed upon way to remain productive and positive all day. By establishing a set practice you can train yourself to start with intention everyday.

Most people have a routine that they do daily without even knowing it, like setting their clothes out the night before or prepping the coffee for the next day. The common theme is eliminating stress or making something easier for yourself.

Let’s be real. 90% of us hit snooze 2 times, pick up our phones, start the social media scroll and before we know it were running behind.

We then rush to shower, get dressed and hopefully grab a coffee before we have to run out the door. This is a high stress situation- starting your day with a very high level of cortisol can cause all sorts of issues like weight gain, poor sleep and acne.. who the hell wants to deal with that on top of what life already throws at us unexpectedly. Not me. nope nope nope. Solution…Morning Routine.

How to start a Morning Routine

While there is no “right” morning routine I have 3 major principles of a morning routine that I have found to be most helpful.

  1. Mindset Focused
  2. Anti-Stress
  3. Self- Centered

Mindset- Focused

Mindset is EVERYTHING. I have said it before and I will say it again, and again. If you have a negative mindset, you will not live a positive life. I know its not a given that we will wake up in a good mood, but through a mindset focused morning routine, we can quickly change that around. I listen to a podcast every morning. My favorites are The Brendon Show, and the Rise podcast. I also listen to The Angie Lee Show and some others. The most important thing is that I find these to be inspiring and they give me something to think about for the day. If you are not a podcast person, I also recommend reading some sort of personal or professional development. Grab a cup of coffee and read for ten minutes. Get your mind flowing in the right direction and set the tone for the day.

Anti-Stress

A morning routine should be something that sets you up to be productive, whatever that means for you. For example, my mother wakes up 3 hours before she has to so she can look at her email, download recipes and listen to ted talks in her bathrobe; while I wake up and immediately head for the gym. I don’t find that searching though Pintrest in the morning is anti-stress and she doesn’t find weightlifting to be particularly wonderful either, but when we talk before we both head to work we are both in the correct head space to take on our day.

Self-Centered

Whaaa? You’re telling me to be self-centered?

Yes, girl. You deserve to be a little bit selfish. Especially when you are focusing on your mindset, your growth and your passions. If you are not selfish it’s not going to work. Due to the nature of self- discovery, self-growth and self-worth you need to focus on… yourself. Sure the laundry needs to be folded, the lunches need to be packed and there are 500 emails sitting in your inbox BUT putting those things before yourself is detrimental when setting up your day. When being self-centered it is important to look at the root of the self. What grounds you? What makes you feel most at peace? What keeps you focused on not stressed? The answer to those questions are what you should be focusing on when you create a self-centered practice.

For me. I am most at peace sitting outside in the early morning with a cup of coffee and listening to the nature around me and grounding myself in the earth. Sure that’s some hippie shit answer but it’s the honest truth.

If you still don’t know where to start ask yourself these three questions when you wake up.

  1. Where is my head at? What do I need to do to get it where it needs to be?
  2. Is there a stressor that is causing me to be in a negative head space? What can i do that will be proactive and productive in reducing that stress.
  3. What can I do for me to be sure that I am my best self as I take on my day?

5 Ways Listening to Podcasts Has Improved My Life.

Over the last month I have been starting to establish my brand and start to make my entrepreneur dreams a reality.

As many of you know I am associated with Beachbody and have been studying their business model for years. They have 4 non negotiable actions that have proven time and time again that help to move the needle forward. One of them- personal development. Ten minutes a day of personal or professional development is a required activity to help you achieve your goals. However, have I done this everyday? HELL NAWW. Who has time to spend 10 minutes reading a book every morning when I could be sleeping in?

Enter the new Podcast craze.

GIRL, this is a GAME CHANGER. My life, my mindset, my reality has changed since I started listening to podcasts EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

Morning Mindset

The first way that listening to podcasts has improved my life is it has improved my morning mindset. Everyday on my way to my 9-5, while I am sitting in traffic, I listen to a podcast. Think about it, you’re sitting there pissed off because Suzie in her fancyass Audi just cut you off and you are running late for work, but you got your girl Rachel Hollis in your ear telling you exactly how to achieve that goal you have been sitting on for years, its not so bad. I am listening to uplifting, inspiring words each morning and it lights a fire under my butt to get to work. While working my 9-5 is not the thing that sets my soul on fire, however it is a stepping stone to reaching my ultimate goals. I see my job as a tool to learn and grow professionally so that when I am ready to take that entrepreneurial leap and go all in I will have the resources, the knowledge and the confidence to make it happen.

Learning for FREE

Podcasts are essentially giving you free information. You want to know how to eat clean?…There is a podcast for that. Want to learn how to create a Facebook marketing campaign?…. There is a podcast for that. Professionals in each space spend time each week talking to their listeners about their zone of genius. For me I am listening to other boss babes and learning how they built their empire using social media for sales and influence. Listening to a half hour podcast is much easier for me to do everyday than it is to take a class at my local community college or sit down and read a text book.

Constant Productivity

By listening to podcasts instead of watching Netflix, for example, I am being consistently productive. We live in a world full of noise. Some noise is productive, and some is not; like spending hours scrolling though Facebook or Instagram.

I am writing this blog post now but I am also listening to a podcast about building small business and my brain is lighting up with ideas. There is no shortage of consumable content in your desired field.

Empowerment

I find daily empowerment by listening to these podcasts. Especially in the saturated market that I am in, it’s SO hard to feel like I can do this, like it’s worth it; these podcasts lift me up and make me say “Well why not me?Whose to say that I can’t do that? Who says that I am not fun or interesting?”

I am someone who speaks up, someone who wants to share my knowledge and opinion with people who are like me. These podcasts are people sharing their knowledge, wanting to help their listeners, these people are just like me.

I Am Not Alone

Not only has listening to these podcasts inspired me in my life, in my day to day- my 9-5, but it has taught me that there are THOUSANDS of people out there that have the same problems, the same concerns as me. All I have to do is type in my problem and there are so many episodes by so many speakers talking about that concern. Podcasts, if done well, are so authentic and therefore inspiring. I feel like these women understand me because they have been where I am.

Business Launch

Hello my lovely readers! I have some very exiting news to share. I have officially launched my Virtual Assistant business!

I am working with two types of clientele. First being boss babes like me who are feeling the burn out of Multi Level Marketing and Networking. While my domain is not working yet- here is my temporary site if you would like to check it out!

Some services I am offering are email marketing, social media posts and graphics. I am also offering consulting on business building, social media marketing and budgeting. If any of this sounds like something you would like to know more about head over to my site and get your hands on the free content!

Secondly, I am offering Virtual Assistant services. I have been a personal assistant and an admin professional for many years and I have decided to take that online to be able to help more people! If you are interested in book keeping, client communication, appointment booking or other administrative tasks I am here to help! You can head over to my services page and check it out!

What is going right in my life?

So often we focus on the negative, what is going wrong. As humans we always ask each other “whats wrong?” and then we respond “oh! nothing” because we don’t want anyone to know why we are actually upset. No one ever asks what is going right, then we answer and that positiveness will spread. Spreading positivity is one of the most underrated forms of therapy in my opinion.

Today’s prompt for my self esteem series is “What is going right in my life?”

The first thing that comes to mind about what is going right is my partner, Melissa. Nothing in my life has ever felt as right as my relationship with her. In that relationship I am me 100% of the time. I don’t have to hide anything and that in its self is so liberating.

Second is my career. I work in email marketing and I have a bright future here. I know that I am valued as a part of the team and that I have a boss who will stand up for me no matter what. Is it exactly what I see myself doing forever, nope but its a stepping stone and its allowing me to make money while I figure out these “messy twenties”.

I am very good at goal setting, I have high hopes and dreams.. (just started singing Panic! at the Disco in my head writing this). I am not scared of these dreams and I try to hustle to hit those goals everyday. I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to make this brand and this blog successful. I want to help people. I want to help the women who have dealt with the things I have not feel so alone, to know there is someone else fighting this fight and we can figure it out.

I do one thing for my self care every day. This is a huge one. It is so important to practice self care when trying to live a positive, healthy life. I am a fitness junkie and I get up at 5:15 and get my butt to the gym. That’s my me time. My happy hour. Starting my day with something for me gets my head in the right place to have a productive and successful day even when things get stressful or overwhelming.

If you get nothing else from this post, please ask yourself “what is going right?” and jot something down. Let me tell you, the head space I am in after writing this is a hell of a lot clearer than it was when I started. Writing this stuff down takes the weight off of you and puts it on the keyboard, the pen, the paper.

I wish there was a magic pill.

a poem-

I wish there was a magic pill, a new discovery, something, anything that I haven’t heard of or tried yet.

I am so sick of fighting the same battle since middle school.

I am so sick of crying when I see a picture of myself or look in the mirror or try on clothes.

I am not someone who gives up easily, I am not someone who is afraid of hard work but DAMN. I am tired.

How much of my life and I willing to let my weight, my looks, my insecurities take away? How much time will I waste letting those demons tell me I am worthless, that I am ugly, that I am a burden.

I feel like there are 2 sides of me.

The one who says “Live your Life” do what you want to do. Own that business, work that side hustle, put yourself out there and strive for your goals.

Then there is the one who says “you’re not good enough, you are not pretty, you are not smart, you will not be successful.” the one who says “eat the damn cookie because who gives a shit, you are already fat anyway.”

I search and search though Pintrest, Google, Web MD; PCOS diets, Insulin Resistance Weight loss, Rapid Weight Loss, plus size diet. The list goes on but the answer is the same.

  1. Drink enough Water
  2. Eat Whole Foods
  3. Stay away from refined carbs
  4. work out daily

I DO ALL OF THESE THINGS AND HERE I AM….

I am constantly fighting every moment of every day. Most times I can deal but today is not one of those days. The demons ate me today. I am fully consumed.

Old ways wont open new doors.

I have a calendar on my desk called #advicefromaunicorn and that was today’s advice. It amazes me just how much the universe knows what we need at the moment we need it.

I embarked on a new adventure yesterday for that exact reason. I have been working and working on finding the right solution to help me lose the weight and get healthy… but I wont get ahead of myself.

After going to my sisters wedding on Friday I was feeling like a piece of garbage. She is a fitness model, who looked like a damn princess that day, as she should, but I couldn’t help but compare myself to her, as I have my entire life. I am a human and comparison is part of our makeup, we know that comparison is a thief of reality and happiness- yet we do it anyway.

The day I got back from New York, Melissa and I joined a new gym that offers fitness classes as well as personal training. Knowing as much as I do about fitness, nutrition and training I never really considered spending the money to do personal training. Last night I took that leap, being the one thing I never tried.

After meeting with Brad- the trainer- we set a goal that is realistic and a timeline to hit it. He explained to me why what I have done in the past hasn’t worked and what we can do to fix it… then we did the workout.

DEAR LORD.

I have never felt more out of shape in my life. My entire vibe changed. I felt defeated and I felt like a liar. I work out 5-6 days a week and I couldn’t even do moves he was asking me to do. My anxiety took over and I started to question everything. I almost cried but I didn’t want to scare the poor man the first time he met me.

We went back to his desk and we made a plan and I committed. If he shows up for me, I will show up for him. If I give him one year of blood, sweat and tears- he will help me to reach my goal.

Happiness and health shouldn’t have a price tag, and unfortunately they do, but the best thing to invest in is yourself. I tell all my clients that and I need to live by my own mantras. I invested and I committed and I am logging it here on the day June 6, 2019. I don’t care if a single one of you reads this post but if you do I would appreciate any love/support. I will help you reach your goals if you help me reach mine.

xx,

Carly

Mindset Makeover

Hello! Happy Thursday 🙂

Last night I kicked off my Mindset Makeover Virtual Course. ( Its free if you still want to join, info is on my freebie page!) It was the first time I ever talked about my own content in my group, it’s the first time I ever went LIVE to talk on a video that wasn’t just a Instagram/Facebook story. IT WAS SCARY AF.. but I did it. It wasn’t perfect but I got the first one out of the way and that is an accomplishment in and of its self.

I wanted to share with you the content that I shared in my video, because who doesn’t need a little mindset shift every once in a while.

What is Mindset?

Mindset is defined as the established set of attitudes held by someone. Meaning that is a somewhat of a habit- its established, not easily shifted. You have heard of a Negative Nancy or a Positive Polly, people tend to gravitate toward one end of the spectrum or the other.

Why is Mindset Important?

Without the proper mindset goals are out of reach.

Negative mindset = negative results.

“The Body achieves what the Mind Believes”

Autumn Calabrese, Beachbody Super Trainer

That is one of my favorite quotes of Autumn’s. The example she uses when talking about this is if you go into your workout saying ” I am so tired, I don’t want to work out it’s going to suck,” then you bet your butt it is going to suck.. you have already put up that roadblock and you are setting yourself up for failure.

Mindset is the key to Success

So how do we create this success?

  1. GRATITUDE– An attitude of gratitude. This helps with the mindset shift, in my opinion it is THE most important part of this shift. If you shift your focus from the things that are going wrong to the things that have gone right and be thankful that you are not heading in the wrong direction. Be thankful that you have the opportunity to grow, be thankful that you have the ambition to keep going! Going hand in hand with gratitude is affirmation. You have to believe that you can reach that goal. Even if you don’t believe it right now, SAY YOUR AFFIRMATION ANYWAY. The more you say it the more you will believe it.
  2. Fake it till you make it, Baby! – You have heard (or maybe you haven’t) that your brain can’t tell the difference between a fake smile and a real smile. Your brain also does not change in an instant, when you learn something new it takes a while for you to absorb that information. By faking it, by affirming your goal, even if you don’t believe it; your brain will learn, over time, that that affirmation is true.
  3. Visualize– THIS IS SO IMPORTANT. When you reach the goal, when you get that thing, what does that look like? What does that feel like? What does it smell like? Put yourself there, feel the moment as you would like to experience it. Feels good right? That is your kick in the butt, that can be your reality if you let it be.

I hope this was at least mildly helpful/inspiring 🙂 If you have more tips and tricks I would love to hear them. Please comment or send me an email!

Hope you have a wonderful Holiday weekend.

XO

Carly

B A L A N C E

Happy Friday my Dear Readers!

This week something I have been lacking had been balance. Balance in my work life and home life and balance in my mind. I have been moving a mile a minute and I have made some, less than wonderful, decisions this week.

Raise your hand if you stress eat? *slowly raises hand*

Raise your hand if you are the person who has a huge ass to do list but sits on Pintrest instead because you are overwhelmed with the stuff on your list so you better just not do anything at all.

How do you get from being overwhelmed and out of wack to being back to balance and control?

My therapist taught me that when you are diagnosed with the depression the best thing you can do for yourself is to force yourself to do the things you don’t want to do. When you don’t want to get out of bed… do it. When you don’t want to work out.. do it. I think this principle applies here as well.

Instead of trying to do all the things you need to take a step back and figure out what you NEED to take care of in order to restore the zen, to get yourself back to the normal.

For example, I am a 5am work out person. This week with all the craziness that has been going on I have not worked out like I normally do. That alone starts my day off kilter. I am so used to having that “me time” in the morning that when I don’t have it my brain is already starting into panic mode. Second, I usually pack my lunch something healthy and filling. Instead this week I have ordered carry out for lunch every day and dinner twice. Not only is that against routine but eating crappy food makes you feel like crap. If you are what you eat… then this week I am crap.

I have been preparing to launch my very first free online course and I am so nervous to do that which is again causing the balance to be wack. My mind is racing with negative thoughts. ” It wont be good enough”, ” No one will come”, “no one will get it”. But, having everyone get it, and come is not the point. I am putting this information out and holding these class sessions because I wish someone was there to give that information to me. Same reason I started this blog. If one person gains anything from this then I have met my goal.

We get so out of balance when we try to take on the world, make everything perfect, do more than we have to. If we focus on the goal and take the steps to achieve that goal the balance is restored and instead of feeling overwhelmed you feel fulfilled.

So here is your take away. What is it that is making you feel off balance and why? Are you doing too much? are you not doing enough? Are you not giving yourself the credit you deserve?

Do only what will help fill your cup, otherwise it is not worth it.

XOXO,

Carly